The Gentleman Cook: Smoked Mackerel Salad

There comes a time in every Gentleman's life when he finds himself bereft of assistance about the house - your valet has his night off, cook's away visiting her sick mother, and the boy is probably off terrorising the neighbourhood.  It's at times like this one must not panic.  Instead raise your belt to a respectable height, adjust your moustache and head forth into the kitchen yourself!

  

I am well aware there are perils to this approach - society rumours suggest the remodelling of Lord P's east wing was due to an improperly boiled egg, while Sir H's whiskers simply haven't been the same since he tried to peel a potato (note: names withheld to protect me from accusations of scandal-mongering).  And let us not forget the health conscious times we live in; it is just Not Done to return home from a vigorous cross country jaunt to raid your pantry and feast upon a gout inducing banquet of jugged meats, rich cheeses and cold roast fowl, all washed down with claret and port.  Well, at least not on a week night. 

So, in light of these considerations I shall disclose to you a recipe that can save you from such a desperate situation.  This is a dish that sees me through the summer months without having to resort to utilising the hob, nor calling on my servants.  Sirs, I give you the simple pleasure of a smoked mackerel salad, with my blessings.

This salad is a perfect 'emergency dish', both for when you don't feel like cooking, or if you need to whip something up in a hurry for an unexpected guest.  And the flavour?  Well, slight bitterness from sliced 'little gem' lettuce leaves is offset by the delightful zing of a simple vinaigrette.  These both help in turn to balance the rich, oily flesh of the mackerel.  As it's summer, freshness is provided by chopped parsley, and finally, umami notes are added by a small amount of parmesan to give a rich lingering flavour to the whole affair.

And of course, for these spendthrift times this is also a very frugal recipe.  Mackerel is one of the cheapest smoked fishes available, and both little gem (and cos) are in season, so it's quite possible to get a good deal on all of the fresh ingredients.  You can of course splash out on more expensive smoked fish, but frankly I feel that mackerel gives such a wonderful flavour this really isn't necessary.

So, Gentlemen, now is the time to don your safety goggles and protective clothing, for we are going to cook.

Ingredients

The ingredients below make enough for a starter or light supper for one person, but scale easily.  You can also vary the vinaigrette ingredients to taste - do not be afraid to sample the flavour before you start assembling the salad!

For the salad:

• Smoked mackerel, one fillet for a starter, two for a supper
• One little gem lettuce per person, or one cos lettuce between two or three, chopped into quarters lengthways then thinly sliced (about half a cm per slice)
• Capers, one tablespoon (brined for preference)
• Around five sprigs of curly parsley, roughly chopped
• Thinly sliced parmesan (about 5-6 slices)

For the vinaigrette:

• Good quality olive oil, three tablespoons
• White wine vinegar, one tablespoon
• Squeeze of lemon
• Salt, pinch
• Pepper to taste

The adventurous could also try adding Dijon or wholegrain mustard, or possibly even horseraddish to this as well - Miss Peas

To begin with, combine the vinaigrette ingredients in a bowl, and whisk together till the oil and vinegar form an emulsion.  Now add the parsley and mix thoroughly (this helps to ensure the vinaigrette gets distributed evenly through the salad).  

Next add the sliced lettuce and thoroughly mix again before tossing in the capers and parmesan.  Finally, flake the mackerel (if using the skin, slice this with a knife if it won't tear easily), and mix half in through the salad.  Arrange the remainder on top in some semblance of art.

  

If you've survived the ordeal of cooking, serve in bowls with a glass of something white and/or bubbly and give yourself a pat on your back.  If you used a knife now is also a good time to check you still have all your fingers.

So Gentlemen, you see not all is doom and gloom when left alone, and you don't have to resort to street vendors or the iniquities of a public house.  But for safety do keep away from the hob or oven - I know they seem like simple devices, but it takes a trained professional such as myself to operate such things and you will just be risking your life and property!

Authors note: Miss Peas reminds me that there are of course also Ladies who are unable to handle themselves about the kitchen.  Therefore please do feel free to read Gentlemen as Ladies should you wish in this and future posts - J Carrot Esq